This Ends Tonight
by xjasminedragonx
Summary: After a run in with some unexpected strangers, Ponyboy must figure out how to get through this. Will he make it? Or will he push everyone away, by pushing himself to the limit?
1. Chapter 1: Why Me?

***Disclaimer: I DO NOT own TheOutsiders in any way. The lovely S.E. Hinton owns The Outsiders - not me :( **

**A/N: Okay so this was actually based off a dream I had one night and I thought it might be the start of possibly good fanfic. I have a few ideas for how the story's gonna go but if you have any suggestions, let me know :) PleaseR&R :)**

**Chapter One - Why Me?**

**Pony's POV**

I could hardly walk, let alone stand. I felt like I was going to die. Actually, I really wanted to at that point. Every step I took, felt like I was about to fall. Those… Those Socs… I can't believe what they did. They might as well have just killed me right there and then. They almost did, it seems. But, they apparently didn't want to be arrested for murder. Not that anyone would know it was them. They would have gotten away either way. I just wished that it never would have happened.

I probably looked horrible, just by the way I felt. I could feel blood slowly moving down my chest, as well as my face and legs. There seemed to be smaller cuts along my arms because the burning was there as well, but I didn't feel any blood moving down my arms. I only had half of a block left now to my house, but I felt like I couldn't make it. I just wanted to lay there and die. I just kept thinking that, over and over in my head. _'Why me?' _I asked myself, questioning everything that just happened.

As I slowly made my way onto the porch, I could hear Darry talking to Dally and Johnny. Two-Bit was most likely glued to the T.V. and I could hear Steve getting mad at Soda for cheating at a game of poker. Like usual. I just sat down on the porch, though, for a while as the tears continued to fall. I couldn't stop them at this point. They just wouldn't stop. 'Just calm down,' I told myself. 'It's okay,' But thinking that just made me cry even harder. The truth was that it wasn't okay. **I **wasn't okay. I couldn't stand to think of what Darry and Soda would say or think if they found out what those Socs did. I couldn't tell them. They would hate me.

I eventually began to calm down, trying not to think about it. I stood up, gripping the wall for support, seeing as I was starting to feel dizzy. I took one quick breath, causing me to wince in pain, before opening the door. As soon as I walked into the living room, Darry shot out of his chair and I instantly knew he was mad.

"Where the hell have you- ," Darry yelled, but stopped as soon as I got further into the room. I must have looked worse than I thought, since Darry's eyes showed concern and sort of horror, while his face paled. "Ponyboy, w-what happened–?"

"S-Socs," I said shaking a little.

Soda came over and I suddenly felt like the walls were closing in on me. The longer I stood there, the more I felt like I was just going to collapse.

"Gosh, Pony, what'd they do to ya?" Soda asked in shock.

"What the hell were you doing out by yourself at this hour? Didn't I tell you before that you aren't supposed to be walkin' alone? Especially at this hour?" Darry questioned, ignoring Sodapop and focusing on me. I winced and started shaking as his concern started to fade back to anger.

I could feel everyone's eyes on me as I stood there, trying not to think about what just happened to me while my brothers were trying to break into those thoughts. _'Look it's baby Curtis.' 'All by himself with no big brothers to save him this time.' _Their voices filled my head, getting louder and louder until I thought my head would explode.

"Pony?" Johnny asked, trying to get my attention after a few failed attempts from Dar and Soda.

My eyes widened as I came back from the battle in my head, turning my attention to my best friend who now stood in front of me, beside Sodapop. I suddenly felt like I was going to burst into tears again. The walls were still moving in on me. I moved forward trying to get around Johnny and towards the bathroom. He grabbed onto my arms trying to figure out what was wrong, but let go as I winced in pain from the touch. I then hurried around him and into the bathroom, locking the door as I finally reached it. I slowly slid against the wall to the floor once I knew the door was locked. My whole body was shaking violently as I lay there, with no control over what was happening. I honestly felt like dying right there and then. I wasn't concerned about anything else. But I somehow managed to stand up after what seemed like hours. I looked at myself in the mirror above the sink. I suddenly burst into tears as I saw how bad I really looked. There was a long cut from right underneath my eye to my jaw line that was burning like hell. Black and blue started to surface around my right eye from when I got punched down to the ground. My arms were all scratched up from the gravel and rocks, and blood was seeping through my old gray t-shirt. I carefully lifted it over my head to find long slash marks from a blade scattered across my chest as well as a few bruises. As I examined the damage across my chest even closer, I noticed a small letter cut into the center of my chest. The letter 's'. I instantly felt nauseous. I was covered from head to toe with bruises and cuts as well as a few other injuries, but this stuck out the most besides the other…horrible thing. I felt so violated and disgusting. I was supposed to be a greaser, not some piece of trash for the Socs to mess around with. How dare they do this? Why did this have to happen to me?

I broke down right there again and couldn't stop this time. The sobs shook me as I gripped onto the sink, trying to keep my balance. I couldn't think straight or think clearly as I stood there. Everything was just rushing at me and hitting me like a sledgehammer. Half of it wasn't even registering in my head and I didn't think it ever really would. I looked up again and tried to calm down as my breathing became strained from all of the crying. My eyes were now bloodshot and everything was blurry.

"Pony, are you okay?"

I could hear my brothers through the door and I knew I wouldn't be able to answer them, seeing that I could hardly breathe. "I can't let them know" I thought to myself. But as I thought that I realized that I couldn't stay in here forever, and I would most likely have to open the door soon or they'd break it down. And that would most likely lead to them finding out. "Can I just die now?" I barely whispered.

"Ponyboy?"

"Y-yeah…" I managed to say softly, regaining part of my voice, as I got closer to the door.

"Can you please open the door?" Soda asked softly.

Part of me wanted to just completely ignore what I was hearing and just die. But the other part was saying that I had to open the door, even though death plagued most of my mind. I just stood there, not able to move as I tried to pull myself together.

"J-just a sec." What was I thinking?

I quickly pulled my t-shirt back over my head, causing me to hiss in pain. Wiping my eyes off I figured that I could go out there, try to avoid them, or something. Something had to work at this point and I had to figure out what that was real fast.

Opening the door, I came face to face with Darry and Soda. I started shaking as I stood in front of them, feeling so vulnerable and worthless. I avoided all eye contact with them as well, not wanting them to read my eyes, since I have been known to wear my heart on my sleeve at times, and I knew I would be right now.

"Pony, are you okay?" Soda asked getting closer to me.

My only response was shrugging my shoulders. I wasn't alright, but I don't think they'd understand if I said anything.

"Can you come and talk to us?" Darry asked, motioning towards the couch. Sirens immediately started going off in my head at this. He wanted me to talk about it in front of the whole gang. I could hardly get over the thought of it myself, so how the hell was I going to tell everyone else? I didn't even want anyone to know. Not even Sodapop.

"No," I whispered backing up a little, shaking my head. "I want to go to bed," I said, my voice breaking with every word.

As I looked at Soda, his eyes grew wide as he noticed the sound of my voice.

"Okay, Ponyboy. Come on, let's go."

I was followed into my room by Sodapop, leaving Darry in the living room with the rest of the gang. As I sat down on the bed, Soda shut the door behind him and sat down as well.

"You know you can talk to me about anything, right, Pone?"

"Y-yeah," I whispered. "I know…"

"You sure you're okay?'

I paused a moment. I have always been able to talk to Sodapop. Why couldn't I now._ 'Because you're filthy and disgusting and not worth it,'_ my mind answered pathetically. But as I thought this I thought about how many times I had talked to Soda in the past and how he never told Darry about half of the stuff I said.

"No," I said quietly, still looking down.

"Talk to me, Pone."

I sighed, deciding I truly didn't want him to know, "It's nothing. Don't worry about it."

"Ponyboy that ain't true."

"Yeah it is!" I almost yelled, ending up in me gasping.

"Pony, what is it?"

Tears blurred my vision, but I tried my best to blink them away, "N-nothing, just...hurts."

"Hold on a sec," he said before getting up and walking out of the room.

_ 'He better not be getting Darry,'_ I silently thought. But to my surprise he came back in, shutting the door, with the first aid kit.

"Can you at least let me clean those cuts up since you won't talk to me?"

I nodded.

He started wiping off the cut on my face and then moved to my arms. I hissed as he put some stuff on the cuts that was supposed to help 'em. It didn't feel like it was helping, though.

"Hey settle down, Ponyboy. It'll only sting for a little bit."

I tried to glare at him but failed to.

"Lift up your shirt, Pone."

My eyes widened and I slowly shook my head "no".

"You're bleeding pretty badly through your shirt, Pony. I have to clean it up before anything gets infected."

I pulled it up halfway and let him take care of those cuts, even if I felt so exposed.

"Pony," he said simply as he managed to pull my shirt up over my head quickly.

I started shaking when he did this and automatically crossed my arms.

"It's okay, Pony," he said softly. "I ain't gonna hurt you. No one's gonna hurt you no more."

I merely whimpered, loosening my death grip on my arms. Soda pulled my arms down a little so the rest of the cuts could be seen.

He looked at them for a minute before starting to clean them up. I knew what he had to be thinking when his eyes passed over 'their mark'. He probably thought I was so disgusting. I didn't want to hear what he had to say. No matter what he said I'd always know the truth.

He leaned back grabbing the tape to wrap my ribs as well as my ankle.

"Are there any other cuts, Pony?" he asked gently.

I just nodded my head, slowly.

"Where?"

I turned around so my back was facing him and the 'x' in the center of it was facing him as well.

"Oh, Ponyboy," he said sadly.

I looked down in shame as he started to clean and bandage it. _'You're just a piece of trash and will never be anything better.' 'This is all you're good for.' 'You're worthless.'_

Tears were streaming down my face without me realizing until Soda spoke up.

"Anything else, Pone? …Ponyboy? Ponyboy?"

I looked up with tears still moving down my face when he came around and sat in front of me.

"Pony, it's okay, baby," he said reaching out and wrapping his arms around me. "Everything's gonna be okay."

I started crying pretty badly into his chest as he held me. I didn't feel okay. This was not okay. It wasn't going to be okay. I could tell. 'Never,' I silently thought, before the darkness started to fuzz around the edge of my vision and everything was starting to get blurry and dark… Just like I had expected it to.


	2. Chapter 2: I'm Dying

**Thank You everyone for the Wonderful reviews :) And thanks for the favs and alerts. **

**Now this chapter is definitely shorter than the last one, but I'm sure they'll be longer after this one. I'll try my best. **

***I DO NOT OWN THE OUTSIDERS (unfortunately) Please R&R**

**Chapter 2: I'm Dying**

As I looked around me, and all I could see was the darkness. It was still surrounding me and Soda's voice was fading and echoing in the distance. My vision was blurry, but getting clearer as something moved out of the corner of my eye.

"Greaser!"

I jumped and searched frantically around me for the source of the sound.

"Get him!" a voice echoed.

I looked up and locked eyes with the source. It was him. Those dark emerald eyes bore into mine for what seemed to be an eternity. The same ones that had been focused on me before.

"No…" I whimpered.

"You should know better than to come around here, Grease," one of them said, eying me up, as the five of them surrounded me.

I looked away from him, looking for a way out. As my eyes fell on the two Socs in front of me, something fell behind them. I looked closer and automatically ran towards the door that had magically appeared back behind them only to be pushed backwards onto the ground.

"Soda! Darry!" I screamed as they started punching and kicking me, not caring how badly they were hurting me.

My brothers suddenly appeared near the door and just stood there watching the scene before them, not even bothering to help me. I screamed in pain when they cut up my chest, leaving their mark behind before flipping me over on my stomach. I looked up briefly and noticed the rest of the gang was there too. They all looked at me with blank faces, as they leaned against the door. I was only brought back to the jumping by a sharp pain in my back as metal cut into it twice diagonally, forming an 'x' overlapping the one that was already there.

"Darry! Soda! Help!" I screamed but once again they didn't move. It was if they didn't care about me. I felt so helpless and abandoned, yet I was so frustrated. Why weren't they doing anything?

Before I could do anything else, the Socs held me down with one kneeling behind me. I froze as two hands touched my lower back, and I could feel a hot breath on my neck.

'No!' I cried in my head with tears streaming down my face. 'This isn't happening… Not again!'

I tried breaking free of their grips but couldn't. They were too strong…and I was too weak. There was no way of escape.

"Now you're gonna be good or this is gonna be a hell of a lot worse than last time," the one behind me whispered in my ear.

I instantly started shaking as I heard this. Worse? I thought they had killed me before…Now they were going to.

The air suddenly became ice cold and I couldn't stop shaking, but out of the corner of my eye I could see the gang in the exact same positions. Not noticing the sudden change in the air. But maybe it was only me. I don't know. But as soon as the coldness came, it left and it felt as though my body had been set on fire from the inside out. I screamed again, wanting for this to end. But there was no end in sight. I tried to look up and could barely see through the tears that clouded my vision as the gang started walking away through the door. They were leaving me to die. I couldn't control myself as my body was arching and twisting in pain and I could feel my throat going raw from so much screaming. I couldn't take it much longer.

The darkness was starting to fuzz around the corners of everything and it sounded like I was under water. 'I'm dying,' I thought before a shout broke through the air and it was suddenly pitch-dark.

"Ponyboy!"

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	3. Chapter 3: The Aftermath

**Okay, I would just like to start by saying that I'm sorry I haven't updated in a long time. Guess that's what happens when you go off to college and have had a lot to deal with personally... But if you're still around here's chapter 3 R&R please =) **

I shot up in bed, looking frantically around me with my hands over my head, where I noticed two things; First, I was back in my room and second, it was still dark. It hadn't gone away.

"Ponyboy…" I jumped as someone grabbed my shoulder. Tears were already forming in my eyes as I backed away a little, fearing the worst before seeing that it was only Sodapop.

"Ponyboy, are you okay?" he asked gently. I started shaking.

"Pony, it's okay. It was just a dream. Nothin's gonna hurt you," he whispered softly as he wrapped his arms around me and I clung to his chest. Sobs shook my body as I sat there with my older brother. The visions of them were still spinning around in my head and they wouldn't go away.

"Do you remember what it was about, baby?" he asked softly, rubbing my back.

I choked on a sob, as it flashed back in my mind, before shaking my head violently, "no."

Soda only tightened his hold on me and whispered soothing words into my ear.

"It's alright. Everything's gonna be okay."

As much as I wished I could believe him, I couldn't bring myself to it. How could anything be okay anymore? We sat there, with Soda holding me, for at least half an hour before I started drifting off to sleep, even though I didn't want to. I didn't want to face the darkness again.

I awoke the next morning to bright sunlight pouring through the window. Groaning, I rolled back over away from the blinding light so my eyes could slightly adjust. After a few minutes I crawled out of bed carefully, wincing in pain at the slightest of movements, before grabbing a loose t-shirt and a pair of jeans out of the dresser and heading towards the bathroom. I locked the door quickly and started the water, making sure it was as hot as it could get…which, in reality, wasn't too hot. Stepping into the shower, I felt the rush of water cascade upon me as I started scouring my body from head to two. So much that patches of skin were turning red from how hard I was scrubbing. After twenty minutes or so, I shut the water off before quickly grabbing a towel and wrapping it around my waist and stepping out in front of the mirror. I looked horrible. Black and blue were in splotches across my skin. I basically looked like I had been through hell and back. I truly felt like I had been.

I quickly threw on the clothes I had on top of the hamper; a pair of jeans with one of Soda's old shirts, before heading out to the front porch. I sat out there and watched the sunrise. It was one thing that would never change, no matter how fucked up life got. And I'm pretty sure it couldn't get any worse at that point. But I could be wrong. Life seemed to always throw me curveballs. No matter what that never failed; They were always aimed at me.

After the sun rose into the sky, gray clouds started to move in. It fit my mood perfectly.

"Pony!" I heard and my head immediately shot up, before I realized that it was only Darry. Standing up, I opened up the screen door and went back into the house.

"Yeah Dar?" I replied softly as I stood in front of the doorway, in front of Darry, Soda, and now Steve and Two Bit.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, Dar. Don't worry about me."

"I just wanted to make sure. I was gonna call off today either way," He said holding a rolled up newspaper in his hand, while standing up in front of me.

"Darry, I'm fine. Go to work okay?"

"Ponyboy, I don't know if that's a good idea."

"Darry...seriously. I. Am. Fine. Now go get ready for work or you're gonna be late. We'll probably be getting bills by the end of the week and you know we can't afford not working, even though I wish it weren't that way."

He sighed setting the newspaper down on the coffee table, looking down and pinching the bridge of his nose, "Fine... You're right. Just please stay here today and take it easy okay? Promise me that?"

"Yes Dar, I promise."

"Thank you. Now Two-Bit," he said directing towards the Mickey Mouse loving man glued to the TV screen with the mouse on it. "Keep an eye out for him today okay?"

Two Bit only nodded, even though I'm sure he knew what was going on. He may be stupid, but he had some sense left in him of some sort. Who really knows what kind but it was sure something.

Darry walked over to me, placing a hand on my shoulder for just a moment before Sodapop ran through the room, searching for his shoe that he already had in his hand.

"Sodapop your shoe's not in the freezer this time. Look down," Darry said, shaking his head before grabbing his tool belt off the table. "We'll see you later Pony."

I simply nodded my head as he walked out the door, followed by Soda. Sodapop gave me a look that was one of concern, but I just gave a small smile to reassure him I was okay, even if I really wasn't. And with that I could hear the old truck start up and head down the road. Turning around, Two-Bit was still glued to the TV. So it was just me in my own world for the time being, since Steve was also at work and Johnny was at school hopefully; he would be if he wasn't getting yelled at or hit by his damn parents. And Dally, who knows what the hell he could've been getting himself into. My guess at this time of day was that he was waking up after random sex with some girl who wasn't Sylvia. I don't question it though. It's not worth getting into it with Dallas.

Heading down the hallway, I fell back onto the bed, not really knowing what to do or what to even think. What had happened kept replaying through my head, though. Their voices kept running through my head, "Damn Greaser! Should know better..." "You're good for only this... No one can help you now, baby." Tears started creeping up on me and I couldn't hold them in, no matter how hard I tried.

"So much for being a Greaser," I whispered to myself as I looked off to the side out the window as dark clouds started coming in even more. It was going to storm today, and that would mean that most of the guys would probably be over most of the night. I couldn't be alone so I'd have to man up. I'd have to get tough as Dally and probably Steve would say. But it could only last for so long.

Later on around 4 o'clock, I heard the screen door squeal open from the rusty hinges, before it came back and slammed against the doorframe. Dally was here and most likely Johnny was too, since my best friend idolized him to an extent. I rolled over onto my side, though facing the window and away from the door, not wanting to deal with Dallas Winston right now, right before I heard my bedroom door open.

"Ponyboy," Dally said softly, which was definitely unusual for him. I stayed silent knowing he wasn't going anywhere anytime soon.

"Pone," I heard as the floor boards creaked, with him walking over to my side of the bed. I looked straight forward as he came into sight and knelt down in front of me. "You okay?" He asked me as he reached out and grabbed onto my shoulder. I tried my hardest not to flinch as I felt someone sit down at the end of the bed. Johnny.

"Yeah I'm fine," I said softly just focusing on Dally and nothing from what happened the previous night.

"You sure?" he asked, forcing me to look straight into his icy blue eyes. I simply nodded, afraid of what my voice would do. "Do you remember any of those jackasses?" He said not even blinking, staring me down almost, just trying to get some information out of me. I shook my head as their faces popped up in my head. I didn't really know their names besides the one named Randy, but I didn't even want to remember the way they looked.

"You sure?" he asked one more time. I nodded my head, as he took a step back. He mumbled something about the "bastards" and carried on swearing worse than a sailor, as he made his way out of the room, leaving Johnny with me.

"Hey, Johnny," I whispered, still staying on my side.

"You okay, Pony? I've never seen you shaken up that bad before," He asked moving closer, so that I could see him if I looked down towards the door.

"I... I'm fine. Just spooked still." He didn't say anything for a moment or two, so I sat up, wincing slightly. "What Johnny?" I asked, trying to ignore the pain.

"I'm just making sure you're okay Pone... You're my best friend. You scared all of us when you came in like that. I don't even think I've gotten it that bad from my old man. At least not all at once."

"I.. I'm gonna be okay Johnnycakes. Maybe not now, but I'm gonna be," I said softly trying to convince myself as well looking into his eyes for only a moment, knowing he could read me better than anyone.

"I know Pony... I know. Just know I'm always here... Do you wanna talk about it at all?" He said cautiously.

I looked down for a moment. I couldn't let him know how disgusting I felt and what they did. He'd look at me so much differently than what he did right now. He'd hate me. He'd think I was weak. He'd think the worst of me. "N-not really," I said softly looking down still.

"Okay, Pony. Just know if you need to I'm here," He said reaching out and giving me a hug. I flinched slightly but prayed to God that he didn't notice. But before I could really think too much into it, I heard the screen door open and slam shut, followed by the voices of two wacko's laughing and carrying on, along with Darry yelling at them not to slam the door.

Johnny and I rolled our eyes and just smiled at each other. "Let's go," He said getting up.

'Here goes nothing,' I said to myself praying that I wouldn't get too many weird looks or even worse questions, as we headed down the hallway and towards the gang.


End file.
